HAMLET - ...What's the news?
ROSENCRANTZ - None, my lord, but that the world's grown honest.
HAMLET - Then is doomsday near: but your news is not true. Let me question more in particular: what have you, my good friends, deserved at the hands of fortune, that she sends you to prison hither?
GUILDENSTERN - Prison, my lord!
HAMLET - Denmark's a prison.
ROSENCRANTZ - Then is the world one.
HAMLET - A goodly one; in which there are many confines, wards and dungeons, Denmark being one o' the worst.
ROSENCRANTZ - We think not so, my lord.
HAMLET - Why, then, 'tis none to you; for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so: to me it is a prison.
ROSENCRANTZ - Why then, your ambition makes it one; 'tis too narrow for your mind.
HAMLET - O God, I could be bounded in a nut shell and count myself a king of infinite space, were it not that I have bad dreams.
GUILDENSTERN - Which dreams indeed are ambition, for the very substance of the ambitious is merely the shadow of a dream.
HAMLET - A dream itself is but a shadow.
ROSENCRANTZ - Truly, and I hold ambition of so airy and light a quality that it is but a shadow's shadow.
HAMLET - Then are our beggars bodies, and our monarchs and outstretched heroes the beggars' shadows. Shall we to the court? for, by my fay, I cannot reason.
ROSENCRANTZ GUILDENSTERN - We'll wait upon you.HAMLET - No such matter: I will not sort you with the rest of my servants, for, to speak to you like an honest man, I am most dreadfully attended. But, in the beaten way of friendship, what make you at Elsinore?
ROSENCRANTZ - To visit you, my lord; no other occasion.
HAMLET - Beggar that I am, I am even poor in thanks; but I thank you: and sure, dear friends, my thanks are too dear a halfpenny. Were you not sent for? Is it your own inclining? Is it a free visitation? Come, deal justly with me: come, come; nay, speak.
GUILDENSTERN - What should we say, my lord?
HAMLET - Why, any thing, but to the purpose. You were sent for; and there is a kind of confession in your looks which your modesties have not craft enough to colour: I know the good king and queen have sent for you.
ROSENCRANTZ - To what end, my lord?
HAMLET - That you must teach me. But let me conjure you, by the rights of our fellowship, by the consonancy of our youth, by the obligation of our ever-preserved love, and by what more dear a better proposer could charge you withal, be even and direct with me, whether you were sent for, or no?
ROSENCRANTZ - [Aside to GUILDENSTERN] What say you?
HAMLET - [Aside] Nay, then, I have an eye of you.--If you love me, hold not off.
GUILDENSTERN - My lord, we were sent for...
Monday, July 11, 2011
With Friends Like These, Who Needs Enemas?